GSQ: New Queen Coronation

Well our Queen made it through all of her challenges, was promoted to her appropriate status, and enjoyed a night at chocolate bar. A happy birthday was most certainly had and our New Queen retired from her day of challenges quite elated by all the well wishes from family and friends through this ordeal.

But what became of the taxation? That is another tale for another day....
Happy 30th Andrea!

Love, Tim, Teagan, Greer, and Finnegan... And maybe Stowe... Begrudgingly.

GSQ: Chocolate Bar

Mulberry and the Big Meatball were no match as Andrea enjoyed all the fine foods of Chef Joe and proclaimed the restaurant the best Italian in Buffalo. Surely her proclamation will end up on the wall, higher than all their other awards.

In her final challenge, Andrea must navigate the seas of paparazzi at the chocolate bar without having any compromising pictures of her taken. It seems the paparazzi have been tipped off that the aspiring queen may make an appearance so she will have to tread extra carefully in this terrain. Let us hope our Queen makes it through the night without many unsavory pictures being taken. Rules state that for each compromising picture the queen will receive a taxation.

GSQ: Mulberrys

After surviving yet another road block, for Challenge 3, Andrea must venture to the lair of Chef Joe Jerge, famous for his Italian food in Lackawanna, NY. Recently reviewed on the Food Network, Andrea must tackle the giant meatball at Joe's restaurant Mulberrys or risk offending the pride of Lackawanna. Is Andrea up to the task?

GSQ: Road Block

Uh Oh... Andrea must be getting too close for comfort. One of her subjects has thrown up another Road Block! In order to pass this Road Block, Andrea must head home, help get Teagan ready for Grandma, and get into a Dress by 6:00pm or she'll miss the Royal WRX limo off to the next challenge.

GSQ: Report from the Field

The evidence of this kind queen's generosity for her lowly subjects is all over my face. Mmm mmm, the cake was delicious. Thanks mommy!

GSQ: Marie Claire's

It seems Andrea had the chops to take all the pampering. Her next stop is a Royal Court Tea party at Marie Claire's where she will be treated to such delicacies as cake and tea / coffee. Hopefully the little break gives her the energy she needs to finish up the training in strong fashion... of course there is a catch. If Andrea wishes to stay on this journey, she will have to share a piece of cake with her husband and daughter. If she chooses to do this she can go on with the challenges as all good queens share a pittance of their vast wealth with their court. If she instead chooses to eat her piece on her own, alas this will be the end of the journey. So which is it? Will we be hearing any more from the aspiring queen? We'll check in with our reporter onsite in just a few moments...

GSQ: Falling Water

Well that road block proved no match for Andrea as she runs off to the next challenge. Challenge 2 takes Andrea to Falling Waters where she must endure more pampering to gain the royal look required of her position. Before she can move on, skilled hand technicians will make sure she can have hands worthy of the royal wave while artists will set upon giving her face the glow that will turn the heads of all her subjects. It will be rough to get through, but so far Andrea is knocking these tasks off one by one...

That being said, the unknown Taxations are piling up... yet another poor sealed hint lies in shreds on the table.

GSQ: Road Block

Andrea has mastered the art of relaxation and is ready to move onto her next challenge.... But what is this?


It seems some people do not want Andrea to complete her training... She has been given a road block and must now hurry to complete its tasks before she is allowed to move on to her next challenge. In this roadblock Andrea must make it home, shower, and blow dry her hair in an hour and a half. With Excuria a half hour away, can Andrea make it in time....

GSQ: Location Excuria

Challenge 1 is underway as our Queen goes off to "Achieve Appropriate Mental Status for a Queen" Her adventure finds her travelling to Excuria to complete the mental relaxation challenge. In this challenge, Andrea will be attended to by relaxation specialists that will prepare her for a balanced zen-like state with a full body massage. Following they will attempt to save her feet from the miles and miles of neglect the poor tootsies have seen.

Will she crack under the pressure? It seems things do not look good as she has already broken down to read the secret of what she would find at this location...

God Save the Queen!

Today is Mommy's birthday so we have arranged for her a little reality show for her to enjoy today called "God Save the Queen".

[In the movie trailer guy voice]
"In a world full of danger, Andrea's family of seemingly loyal subjects has entered her into a training camp for princesses aspiring to be Family Queens. Should she complete the rigorous challenges, she will arise to the high position of Family Queen but should she fail the world will fall to ruin. Cats will live with Dogs. Babies will stop cooing. Republicans and Democrats will hold hands and go to picnics together. Armageddon awaits if she fails.... can Andrea complete these challenges and survive to be Queen?"

Public Service Announcement

Today we refrain from humor so that I can bring an important matter to your attention. Do not let your babies walk after consuming massive ammounts of baby libations (aka milk). The effects of milk on a growing baby are not yet 100% known. Sure it may build strong bones, but what about the rest of the body? I am convinced that it is no good for coordination or balance. To prove it to you, I have experimented upon myself for the greater good of babies all around. As the videos of my experiments will demonstrate, milk clearly has adverse effects that you must consider immediately.

Exhibit A:
Here is Me after a few sips of milk. As you can see the effects start to set in almost immediately.


Exhibit B:
Here is Me after a few more sips of milk. With actions that are beyond my control, I am now making crazy sounds and walking like a zombie.


Exhibit C:
Here is Me after finishing the glass of milk. I now have a complete inability to follow any sort of line and would fail a police sobriety test even on Bourbon Street.


Exhibit D:
After sleeping it off for the night to clear my head, I proceeded to the control part of the experiment by drinking a bottle of water. I think the results speak for themselves.

Note: No babies were physically harmed at the time of these videos. No promises can be made about future psychological problems that may result from the parties in question viewing these videos 14 to 15 years down the road.

Goddess

Hello everyone!

What is the number one question on people's minds? "Why haven't you posted" Well I'm here to clear that up.

You see my Mom & Dad are bad influences on me and let me watch Two and a Half Men... and let me tell yah, that Charlie Sheen knows how to have fun! With this impression firmly implanted in my mind, I have taken up the new calling of Party Animal! I'm on a new drug called Teagan Masterson. You can't have it because you would cry from all of the cuteness.

As evidenced by the following picture taken by Aunt Jen, I've been banging 7 ounce bottles. Because that's how I roll. I have one speed. Go!



Further evidence of my new lifestyle has been acquired from family friend Mike Jackson. As shown here, I am riding a horse.... no let me rephrase, the horse is being ridden by me. Whoop Whoop! I have baby blood and am a tsunami of baby fun!



If you are disturbed by this new side of me, that is because you don't have a baby brain and can't process me. If you need someone to blame.... blame this guy in the following picture. He clearly is the humble model I need to clean up my ways. LOL!